Thursday, January 31, 2013

Games that I'm excited about!

I've been jumping up and down and up and down and up and down and etc for Bioshock Infinite! THIS IS GONNA BE THE BEST GAME EVER!
 http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20110710220111/bioshock/images/a/ac/E32011Songbird1.png
This is the Songbird. How tall? 30 feet. How strong? Strong enough to pop you like a balloon.
INTESTINES EVERYWHERE BLOOD LEAKING OUT OF YOUR POPPED TORSO OH GOD.
http://images.wikia.com/bioshock/images/7/76/BioShockInfiniteHim.jpg
Game Informer also made their magazine cover into an authentic Songbird cover!

If you know about Dishonored, then you probably remember about Thief.

If you do, then you probably know about this creepy level.
http://i243.photobucket.com/albums/ff62/GuyrAdamantine/poster59404577.jpg
What happened to the building? PYROTECHNICS! Now it's haunted. It's twice as scary as the sewers of the Flooded District, 3 times as scary as Ravenholm and 100 times scarier than Miscarcand.

Here are what people say about the scariest levels in gaming.

The hotel from Vampire the masquerade: Bloodlines was scary, IMO.
As was pretty much all of the Marine campaign, in Aliens vs Predator (2).

Yea I'm going to say Shalebridge Cradle from Thief Deadly Shadows. Playing that level in the middle of the night, alone with the sound turned up high had to be one of the most psychologically intense moments of my life. That level alone was worth the price of the game.

The level where i saw your moms face lol jk
i guess whilst in ravenholm or w\e from half life 2, at least the first time. i think i get scared easy in games though, lol

Yep, that guy gets scared easily in games. Ravenholm was creepy, but not scary.

Lab X-18 in S.T.A.L.K.E.R is pretty scary too. Perhaps because of the lumbering Pseudogiant.
http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20111022210706/stalker/images/2/2e/Cop_pda_pseudogiant.png
It looks like that. Very big.

They're also very fast, and they charge at you like gorillas!
File:Pseudogiant.png
When you see that, you know it's time to run.
File:Pseudogiantclose.jpg
Okay! I'm ready for my closeup!

There are a lot of dangerous things in Lab X-18.

Snorks, Poltergeists, PYROgeists, Burners, The list goes on and on.

Scary games listed in the comments of a thread:

- the Ravenholm levels of Half-Life 2
- Aliens v Predator 1 & 2 marine missions (that damned tracker going off all the time is an ingenious way to raise the tension)
- some of the supernatural moments in FEAR, and I don't just mean seeing the girl but glimpsing an object move across the room from you and wondering if it was something you did, or something else
- Undying, when you hear the Howlers coming (I always find those things hard to hit for some reason)
- the Haunted Cathedral level in Thief: The Dark Project is creepy too.

Time to describe.
http://www.clivebarker.info/hortonhowlers.JPG
These are Howlers.

Oh, and by the way, AvP missions when you're the alien are awesome. Instead of the scared, you are the scarer. Is that a word, autocorrect? No? Dang.

Oh, and the scariest moments I've seen?

5. Cry Of Fear: FACE JUMPSCARE

All I can say is: GOD THAT THING IS HORRIFYING

4. Condemned Criminal Origins: Dat Lockarrrrrrrrrr.

Oh noes look at that dead body in that locker! Better take a picture! No, that one was too blurry, better get closer and take anoth- OH GOD IT'S GOT MY ARM

3. Cry Of Fear: The Forest Segment

Do those hanged ladies just want hugs or do they really want to hurt you? I wanna know. Either way, they creep the heck out of me. WHAT THE HECK JEFF THE KILLERS ON ROPES JUMPING OUT OF TREES

2. Korsakovia: All Of It.

Who knew that thechineseroom can make scary games too? I knew, since Dear Esther is scary. VERY SCARY. EMOTIONALLY SCARY.

And finally, what you've all been waiting for..........

1. Ghoul's Forest 3: Yurei.

Dang, those last 3 monsters sure were a Jumpscare-Fest! I think I'm done now! Oh wait, there's that creepy floating lady boss. OK, I'm pumped! I'm gonna defeat her! And cue disturbing picture jumpscare:
 http://media-cache-ec4.pinterest.com/upload/202662051953190981_CsiEG1OU_c.jpg
AAAAAAAAAAAAAH GOD.

But wait! A challenger appears........... What's that? You think you're scarier than Yurei? Well step right up, creepy map! We could go on an adventure in you!

Inserting zf_dustbowl into maps.

Ok, playing. LETS GO INTO THAT DARK SPACE! HOW SMART OF ME-

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Good, but no cigar. Sorry.


But one of the scariest games is Prey. PLAY EET!

The story: Some aliens are abducting us! Eating us! And they abducted a school bus. You know what happens there, but the children are still alive! Horray! But not for long. Alien comes in. Possesses girl. AND THEN TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE. All of the children are possessed zombie-children now. Yay.

That was also in one of the scariest moments.

By the way, that Prey moment? Horrible. Upchucking Horrible. Even worse than the Cry Of Fear Trashbag-Wearing Children Horrible. Now that's horrible. But hey! I'm a child! I can defend my own kind! But if I was actually into playing horror games, then Prey would be fine. I'M OK WITH IT! AND I'M STUPID!
Oh, and forgot to mention, almost in my teen years. So I guess the scary games are going to have to wait just a few more months......

Oh, and everyone who played SWAT 4! Remember the Fairfax Residence?

And that is it. The End.

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